Still Staring: What the World Doesn’t Understand About Autism

This morning, as I sit in the quiet—my favorite part of the day—I feel sad and almost defeated. Will it ever be enough? We are putting finishing touches on our huge fundraiser on Sunday. All the videos, posts, news appearances…so much buzz and so many people attending. But yet, as much as I talk and write about Autism, it is still there; it is still hard; it is still something that makes people stare and truly not get it.

Last night I went to visit my son, Dylan. I cannot get so caught up in this nonprofit that I forget what inspired me to want to help so many: my Dylan. I live the Dylan’s House mission everyday, whether Dylan lives with me or not. I live with all the issues and the worries. I get the texts from the caregivers that Dylan is asking for me…

Dylan was out of a lot of his favorite things: blue gatorade, chips, ice cream sandwiches, the cherry Pop Tarts that he uses to take his pills. These are big things, even if they seem small.

So, I decided that before going to Burger King, I would take him to Meijer to grab those things. I was actually nervous about this. I know that seems crazy, and I am sure if most people needed to run into the store it wouldn't be a big deal, but I have said before that I can only control Dylan with my words and not physically.

For the most part, he did good. He was loud and excited. People stared and then looked away. They moved away from us as if Dylan was contagious. They watched as I had to coax him to leave and they sighed with annoyance as he stood in the middle of an aisle and wouldn't move.

I couldn’t help but think, “Really? Are we still acting like this? Do we still not understand Autism? Have we still not educated our youth and even ourselves?”

There’s still so much work to be done.

Small outings like taking Dylan to Meijer is a way to increase awareness and patience among the community. With Dylan’s House, we take that mission further by providing education and taking care of and training caregivers so our vulnerable population lives the life they deserve.

I didn't ask to be part of this Autism world—and Dylan certainly didn't—but here we are, and we make the best of it.

On Sunday, April 13, we hosted the 3rd Annual Sunday Funday with RDNA. Every dollar raised will go to “raising the roof” on the houses this community so desperately needs.

Long after our attendees go home to whatever their “normal” looks like, there will be parents all through the community taking care of children with Autism, all of whom will grow up and often still have the needs of a toddler. They live in chaos where maybe their furniture is broken from aggressive individuals that just can’t  help it, or maybe they are afraid of their own children and their aggression. Maybe their marriage is barely hanging on. These families more than likely lay awake at night wondering what will happen as their sweet child with Autism grows into an adult.

Next time you grab your kids and run into the store to get what you need, think of us and choose acceptance—choose kindness.